Do you ever get the feeling that there is so much to see in this world and you don't have near enough time to see it all?!
I do. Almost ever day. I can't get enough. Not even in Texas. I want to go to Krause Springs and Guadalupe Peak and Concan and the many beautiful Texas rivers, etc. I want to experience it all.
Getting in the car and driving for hours makes most people cringe...it makes me exceptionally happy. The road...comfortable car...great music...LOVE it!
When I worked for Ernst & Young, I traveled to Chicago for training. Do you think I stayed in my hotel room before and after trainings were over? What do you think? I was up at 6:00 am down at the pier trying to consume every bit of Chicago. I went to see all the touristy places and then the hole in the wall Chicago dives.
I love how large cities are the same and yet so different. Dallas for instance is highly crime driven in downtown, where as Chicago is quite safe downtown.
In June, I took a trip to the Grand Canyon all by myself. It was the best experience and so incredible. I do love traveling with friends, but sometimes it's nice to be alone. So...I'm doing it again!
I'll be in Boston for training at the end of August and will be using the trip to my advantage. I will hit 7 states in 7 days. Maine, Massachusetts, Vermont, New Hampshire, Rhode Island, Connecticut, and New York!
I grew up in the middleofnowhere, TX and I'm interested to see the rural community of Wells, ME and how it compares. I'm sure it will be a million times prettier, but will still have the same warm feeling of being safe and at home. I'll see the sunset on the beach in that small town. An experience I'm sure I'll always remember (and of course capture on camera)!
"Isn't that weird, to take a trip by yourself?" No. And I'm not sure why not. I wish I could explain how it makes me feel. I do enjoy the company of others very much, but it's mind clearing; being in the middle of no where by yourself. Meeting new people. Just observing and getting a grasp on the environment around you.
"Are you soul searching?" Haha, anyone who asks this is always thinking in their head..."Poor girl, she really isn't ok and needs to find herself." Which consequently makes me laugh and shake my head because I know they just don't get it. And it's ok that they don't...I don't mind. If it were true , than I've been "soul searching" my whole life. But I think I just really love what God has created; in people of different background and cultures and in the diverse
land through this world. I hope I can just see a fraction of it!
Friday, August 6, 2010
Wednesday, August 4, 2010
Today's favorite
I hadn't heard this song before today and it's one of my new favorites...
"I'd like that a lot" by Stephen Ashbrook
Sometimes I'd like to take you and run away
Just back up the car and drive
We'd head out west 'cause the west is the best
It's the best that we could find
It's got the biggest blue skies you've ever seen
Nothing 'neath be dancing you and me
Oh, I'd sure like that a lot
Sometimes I feel like a great glass car
In a great big dirty lot
Either way you lose it's just up to you to choose
If you even move or not
And I'm losing ground and I'm losing piece by piece
Girl I need a change
Oh, I'd sure like that a lot
Sometimes I think we oughta kiss it all goodbye
If we're never gonna leave 'cause
I can't stand the thought of you and I
Stuck here another day
And I'm losing ground and I'm losing piece by piece
Girl I need a change
I'd gotta run, run away
I'd gotta run, far away
Oh, I'd sure like that a lot
I'd sure like that a lot
"I'd like that a lot" by Stephen Ashbrook
Sometimes I'd like to take you and run away
Just back up the car and drive
We'd head out west 'cause the west is the best
It's the best that we could find
It's got the biggest blue skies you've ever seen
Nothing 'neath be dancing you and me
Oh, I'd sure like that a lot
Sometimes I feel like a great glass car
In a great big dirty lot
Either way you lose it's just up to you to choose
If you even move or not
And I'm losing ground and I'm losing piece by piece
Girl I need a change
Oh, I'd sure like that a lot
Sometimes I think we oughta kiss it all goodbye
If we're never gonna leave 'cause
I can't stand the thought of you and I
Stuck here another day
And I'm losing ground and I'm losing piece by piece
Girl I need a change
I'd gotta run, run away
I'd gotta run, far away
Oh, I'd sure like that a lot
I'd sure like that a lot
Tuesday, August 3, 2010
Regret?
"Don't you just wish you had a time machine and could take back the last few years? Then everything wouldn't be so hard and complicated for you..."
When I think about my closest friends right now and the amazing people I've met over the last 4 years, I can't imagine not having them in my life. These people have an intense perspective on life, a level head on most situations and a need to help those around them. They feed on positive energy and healthy relationships. And they're protective; there for me when I need them most and I definitely try to show them the same affection.
I've learned so much over the last few years...
I learned who would stand by my side and who would judge, come to conclusions and walk away. I learned that in the face of judgement, others would truly pick themselves and say whatever they could to make themselves look more superior, even if it were at the cost of others. I learned to 'speak softly and carry a big stick'. I learned that even though things may seem unbearable at times, the best has yet to come and someone, somewhere always has it worse.
So, sure, it's been hard. Sure, it's been complicated. Sure, I've been torn up. Sure, I've been degraded and looked down on. But, I've learned invaluable lessons. I've met amazing people. I've bounced back in an incredible way and I've never been as happy and proud to be who I am because of it all.
I wouldn't go back. I wouldn't take the easy route. I wouldn't change a thing, because God knows what's best. He knows our path and I trust in him. I'm truly happy and more myself than I've ever been. :)
“When I look into the future, it's so bright it burns my eyes.”
When I think about my closest friends right now and the amazing people I've met over the last 4 years, I can't imagine not having them in my life. These people have an intense perspective on life, a level head on most situations and a need to help those around them. They feed on positive energy and healthy relationships. And they're protective; there for me when I need them most and I definitely try to show them the same affection.
I've learned so much over the last few years...
I learned who would stand by my side and who would judge, come to conclusions and walk away. I learned that in the face of judgement, others would truly pick themselves and say whatever they could to make themselves look more superior, even if it were at the cost of others. I learned to 'speak softly and carry a big stick'. I learned that even though things may seem unbearable at times, the best has yet to come and someone, somewhere always has it worse.
So, sure, it's been hard. Sure, it's been complicated. Sure, I've been torn up. Sure, I've been degraded and looked down on. But, I've learned invaluable lessons. I've met amazing people. I've bounced back in an incredible way and I've never been as happy and proud to be who I am because of it all.
I wouldn't go back. I wouldn't take the easy route. I wouldn't change a thing, because God knows what's best. He knows our path and I trust in him. I'm truly happy and more myself than I've ever been. :)
“When I look into the future, it's so bright it burns my eyes.”
Tuesday, July 20, 2010
Ok, really…it’s time…let it go.
This started out with a bitter/opinionated undertone:
“I don’t believe you have to lose part of yourself to be with someone.
I do believe that the perfect person will accept you for exactly who you are.
I don’t believe a marriage has to be structured with a male monetary provider and a female housewife.
I believe that couples can go on separate vacations with friends and be ok as long as their relationship is strong and full of trust and admiration. And I believe it’s necessary to have time away from your significant other.
Insert another…I’m unconventional and don’t feel the need to fit in a societal box.”
As most of you know, I’m extremely independent and take pride in being self made. I embellish in the fact that I don’t need a guy to make me happy or to make my life complete. I made that “mistake” of letting someone in and was more dependent and look where it got me...
The truth is…I’m a little tired of being bitter. I’m ready to be a little more open to the idea of…I don’t know…letting a guy buy me dinner without being in physical pain. Ha.
In the end…I’m going to keep going with the flow, having a good time, loving being single, but be more accepting of the possibility that if I find someone that I like that I’ll let them in. I’m not the cheesy hopeless romantic type, but I want to be smitten…eventually. :)
Love this song -> http://www.playlist.com/playlist/additem/588729105
"Can you lie next to her
And give her your heart, your heart
As well as your body
And can you lie next to her
And confess your love, your love
As well as your folly
And can you kneel before the king
And say I’m clean, I’m clean
But tell me now, where was my fault
In loving you with my whole heart
Oh tell me now, where was my fault
In loving you with my whole heart
A white blank page
and a swelling rage, rage
You did not think
when you sent me
to the brink, to the brink
You desired my attention
but denied my affections, my affections
So tell me now, where was my fault
In loving you with my whole heart
Oh tell me now, where was my fault
In loving you with my whole heart
Aah, aah...
Lead me to the truth and I
will follow you with my whole lie
Lead me to the truth and I
will follow you with my whole lie
Aah, aah..."
“I don’t believe you have to lose part of yourself to be with someone.
I do believe that the perfect person will accept you for exactly who you are.
I don’t believe a marriage has to be structured with a male monetary provider and a female housewife.
I believe that couples can go on separate vacations with friends and be ok as long as their relationship is strong and full of trust and admiration. And I believe it’s necessary to have time away from your significant other.
Insert another…I’m unconventional and don’t feel the need to fit in a societal box.”
As most of you know, I’m extremely independent and take pride in being self made. I embellish in the fact that I don’t need a guy to make me happy or to make my life complete. I made that “mistake” of letting someone in and was more dependent and look where it got me...
The truth is…I’m a little tired of being bitter. I’m ready to be a little more open to the idea of…I don’t know…letting a guy buy me dinner without being in physical pain. Ha.
In the end…I’m going to keep going with the flow, having a good time, loving being single, but be more accepting of the possibility that if I find someone that I like that I’ll let them in. I’m not the cheesy hopeless romantic type, but I want to be smitten…eventually. :)
Love this song -> http://www.playlist.com/playlist/additem/588729105
"Can you lie next to her
And give her your heart, your heart
As well as your body
And can you lie next to her
And confess your love, your love
As well as your folly
And can you kneel before the king
And say I’m clean, I’m clean
But tell me now, where was my fault
In loving you with my whole heart
Oh tell me now, where was my fault
In loving you with my whole heart
A white blank page
and a swelling rage, rage
You did not think
when you sent me
to the brink, to the brink
You desired my attention
but denied my affections, my affections
So tell me now, where was my fault
In loving you with my whole heart
Oh tell me now, where was my fault
In loving you with my whole heart
Aah, aah...
Lead me to the truth and I
will follow you with my whole lie
Lead me to the truth and I
will follow you with my whole lie
Aah, aah..."
Monday, June 7, 2010
Time for myself
I had not heard of this book until I saw the previews with Julia Roberts a few weeks ago. It's called, "Eat, Pray, Love" and here's a snapshot:
"I got started early in life with the pursuit of sexual and romantic pleasure. I barely had an adolescence before I had my first boyfriend, and I have consistently had a boy or a man (sometimes both) in my life since I was fifteen years old...each overlapping the next, with never so much as a week's breather in between.... And I can't help but think that's been something of a liability on my path to maturity."
That was exactly when I had my first boyfriend and how I've gone about dating for NINE years!
"Elizabeth had everything that a woman is suppose to want - A loving husband, country home, and a successful career but although she lived what seemed like a perfect life, she couldn't figure out why she still felt so unfulfilled (Did someone capture my life in a book without me knowing?). This New York Times Best Seller is about her a journey to three different countries in order to find divine peace. I read about her pursuit of pleasure in Italy, her pursuit of devotion in India and her pursuit of balance in Indonesia."
I've taken the recent initiative to let it all go, be single and focus on myself. I'm assuming this book will further inspire me to let it all go and chase after those dreams that I once thought I would never be able to achieve in my current situation.
"I got started early in life with the pursuit of sexual and romantic pleasure. I barely had an adolescence before I had my first boyfriend, and I have consistently had a boy or a man (sometimes both) in my life since I was fifteen years old...each overlapping the next, with never so much as a week's breather in between.... And I can't help but think that's been something of a liability on my path to maturity."
That was exactly when I had my first boyfriend and how I've gone about dating for NINE years!
"Elizabeth had everything that a woman is suppose to want - A loving husband, country home, and a successful career but although she lived what seemed like a perfect life, she couldn't figure out why she still felt so unfulfilled (Did someone capture my life in a book without me knowing?). This New York Times Best Seller is about her a journey to three different countries in order to find divine peace. I read about her pursuit of pleasure in Italy, her pursuit of devotion in India and her pursuit of balance in Indonesia."
I've taken the recent initiative to let it all go, be single and focus on myself. I'm assuming this book will further inspire me to let it all go and chase after those dreams that I once thought I would never be able to achieve in my current situation.
Making it happen
Well...it's really happening this time. I'm Grand Canyon bound! Like I've said before, I've never been and it's time to stop sitting on it and just get it done.
My batteries are packed, I'm ready to go. I'm standing here, gas can in hand. I hate to admit I'll probably break a bone. 'Cause I'm leaving to the Grand Canyon, don't know when I'll be back again...ok that's enough...
There's a new moon on the night of June 12th and I can't wait to see more stars than I've ever seen! I'll map out my journey here:
Map of entire trip: http://www.google.com/maps?f=d&source=s_d&saddr=Austin,+TX&daddr=Grand+Canyon+Village,+AZ&hl=en&geocode=FRHXzQEdK48s-ikvA8ygmbVEhjF61WnUS0abXQ%3BFSQGJgIdNapQ-Skl4_-VTxczhzGhniKadMLMuA&mra=ls&sll=35.986896,-111.74469&sspn=1.253422,2.112122&ie=UTF8&t=h&z=6
2,200 miles in 3.5 days.
Thursday night(5pm - midnight) - Leave Austin for Lubbock to see the family and get a free meal and lodging.
Friday (8am - 8pm) - Drive to the Grand Canyon, see the stars, explore. Drive back to Tusayan to hotel.
Saturday (5:30am - 3pm) - Drive to the Grand Canyon, see the sunrise, explore.
Saturday (3pm - 10pm) Drive to Albuquerque, NM to see my cousins. Meal and lodging.
Sunday (8am - midnight) Drive back to Austin to record said exploration.
Solitary road trip. Just me and some music. Getting into the deep beautiful melancholy of everything that's happened.
Wish me luck...I'll probably need it.
My batteries are packed, I'm ready to go. I'm standing here, gas can in hand. I hate to admit I'll probably break a bone. 'Cause I'm leaving to the Grand Canyon, don't know when I'll be back again...ok that's enough...
There's a new moon on the night of June 12th and I can't wait to see more stars than I've ever seen! I'll map out my journey here:
Map of entire trip: http://www.google.com/maps?f=d&source=s_d&saddr=Austin,+TX&daddr=Grand+Canyon+Village,+AZ&hl=en&geocode=FRHXzQEdK48s-ikvA8ygmbVEhjF61WnUS0abXQ%3BFSQGJgIdNapQ-Skl4_-VTxczhzGhniKadMLMuA&mra=ls&sll=35.986896,-111.74469&sspn=1.253422,2.112122&ie=UTF8&t=h&z=6
2,200 miles in 3.5 days.
Thursday night(5pm - midnight) - Leave Austin for Lubbock to see the family and get a free meal and lodging.
Friday (8am - 8pm) - Drive to the Grand Canyon, see the stars, explore. Drive back to Tusayan to hotel.
Saturday (5:30am - 3pm) - Drive to the Grand Canyon, see the sunrise, explore.
Saturday (3pm - 10pm) Drive to Albuquerque, NM to see my cousins. Meal and lodging.
Sunday (8am - midnight) Drive back to Austin to record said exploration.
Solitary road trip. Just me and some music. Getting into the deep beautiful melancholy of everything that's happened.
Wish me luck...I'll probably need it.
Wednesday, June 2, 2010
Obsessed with now
My 24th birthday was this weekend and let's just say that I have the best friends a girl could hope for. 22 of us floated the river, while the best BBQer in Texas (I'm completely convinced) made us breakfast, lunch, and dinner!
It has become an annual event that started last year on my 23rd birthday. I needed to get away, forget about things and surround myself with the people who loved me. I thought that I needed that time to relax and figure things out. Figure out where I was headed and what I wanted to do with my life here on earth. Have I figured it out in the past year? No. But has anyone?
The human race is transfixed with wondering what will happen in the future. Where will they be in 5 years, 10 years from now. These are popular questions asked on "about me" surveys. Psychic jobs exist for this reason. I have no data to back this up, but I would assume that college students' and graduates' greatest worry is..."what now?" When the stock market crashed in 2008 (also known as "The Panic of 2008"), that's exactly what happened, people panicked. What's going to happen next...stress, stress, stress. It's just ingrained in our minds and I would assume even more in American minds.
I have figured one thing out in the past year. I don't want to be obsessed with the future. I want to be obsessed with now. I want to be more accepting of the fact that it's ok to not know what will happen tomorrow, but hope to transfer that fear I have of knowing...into a knowing of knowledge and not obsession with the future.
It has become an annual event that started last year on my 23rd birthday. I needed to get away, forget about things and surround myself with the people who loved me. I thought that I needed that time to relax and figure things out. Figure out where I was headed and what I wanted to do with my life here on earth. Have I figured it out in the past year? No. But has anyone?
The human race is transfixed with wondering what will happen in the future. Where will they be in 5 years, 10 years from now. These are popular questions asked on "about me" surveys. Psychic jobs exist for this reason. I have no data to back this up, but I would assume that college students' and graduates' greatest worry is..."what now?" When the stock market crashed in 2008 (also known as "The Panic of 2008"), that's exactly what happened, people panicked. What's going to happen next...stress, stress, stress. It's just ingrained in our minds and I would assume even more in American minds.
I have figured one thing out in the past year. I don't want to be obsessed with the future. I want to be obsessed with now. I want to be more accepting of the fact that it's ok to not know what will happen tomorrow, but hope to transfer that fear I have of knowing...into a knowing of knowledge and not obsession with the future.
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